Relationships: When human nature meets the daily miracle

Source: The miracle behind every match

"Rabbah bar bar Hana said in the name of Rabbi Yohanan: And pairing them is as difficult as the parting of the Red Sea."

(Babylonian Talmud, Tractate Sotah 2a)

Explanation: When physics meets the soul

The Sages use an extreme metaphor. Pairing two people is not "difficult" in the sense of logistical effort (like lifting a heavy weight), but difficult in an ontological sense—it defies the laws of physics. The parting of the Red Sea was an event in which water, governed by deterministic nature, was forced to stand like a wall, contrary to its physical properties. The same is true of relationships: human nature is egocentric, individualistic, and closed off. The ability of two foreign worlds to unite into a single entity is a miracle that requires changing nature itself.

Perspective: A defense of frustrated couples

This Talmudic statement is a defense of every frustrated couple. The difficulty in a relationship is not a "glitch"—it is an integral part of it. For a relationship to work, one must exert a supernatural force against the ego, against boredom, and against the force of magnets with identical poles. Every morning a couple wakes up together and stays together is a miracle equal to the parting of the Red Sea. Even if you thought for a moment that you managed to reverse the magnetic poles and make attraction feel effortless, you will discover that the poles flip again and again. Perhaps we would have preferred a more comfortable creation, with magnetism that draws us together rather than pushes us apart; but nature gave us a crucial tool to cope: the power of constant choice.

Going Deeper: Relationships versus the second law of thermodynamics

The second law of thermodynamics (entropy).

In nature, every closed system tends toward disorder (chaos) and energy dissipation over time. To maintain order and structure (like a living cell or a relationship), energy must be invested continuously from the outside (work). A relationship is an anti-entropic system (like the wall of water at the Red Sea); if you stop investing energy into it ("just let it flow"), it will inevitably break down and return to a state of chaos and separation.

Culture: A twenty-year love: A song about the beautiful struggle

Jacques Brel's song "A Twenty-Year Love," translated into Hebrew by Naomi Shemer, marvels at a relationship that can survive for a long time—even twenty years…!

We knew fire, we knew thunder / And a twenty-year love / More than once we ran from each other / But we would always return… / My beauty / You are my one and only, my enchanted one / From the light of dawn until my night arrives / I love you, / I love you still.

I know your spells / The lies, the secrets. / One must always keep an eye open / And beware of traps… / Time still plays a dirge / And the days are painful / But there is no trap as dangerous / As the tranquility of lovers… / Tenderly, the war goes on.